Realization

I've come to realize that no one is able to tell me what my body can and can't do, and how it will react to different rides of different exertion levels. Apparently every person is different, and every circumstance is different and there is no "handbook" of how to recovery from a back injury.

After this past weekend's rides my "disk" appeared to be a tad bit aggravated. While I am not experiencing the severe pain I had prior to my 2 epidural injections, I did get the constant numb & tingly feeling back in my left leg, all the way down into my left foot. I also got the deep aching pain in my left glute back, which I've come to realize is the actual disk being irritated. I understand this is how the whole thing started, so obviously I'm more than a little cautious about pushing it too much.

I've spent the week researching my disk issues, looking for information that may help me make an intelligent decision as to how to proceed with "my life", and I just haven't found the answers I'm looking for. . . . . .or any answer for that matter.

Yesterday, after taking 2 days off the bike, I rode at Blue for about an hour. Today it seems my issues are the same. I don't think they've worsened, although they definitely haven't gotten any better. I guess that means I keep taking it one day at a time, one step at a time. Sooner or later it's either going to get better, or revert back to where it was. At least then I'll know.

I broke down and finally took my WORS plate off my bike yesterday. It was a sad moment, because it was me admitting that unless some miracle happens, I'm not getting back to racing any time soon. I was not prepared when this whole thing happened for the possibility that I might not be able to bounce back quickly. But again. . . . .baby steps. Right now I'll ride for fun at 60-75 minutes at a crack and hopefully soon I'll be able to ride "hard" and/or "long" again without pain or "issues". When that happens, I'll be able to kick the training in again. Right now, I just hope to not lose any more fitness than I already have.

This may be a long road back. . . . . .but I'll get there. It may be next year before I'm lining up on the start line again. . . . . .but I can wait. I have to.